Archive for February, 2010

Broken

Posted in Uncategorized on February 14, 2010 by ritafeldman

I’m realizing more and more that losing face is what The Way of the Heart is all about. If face isn’t lost, there is still something being held on to. Still a limit on communion with Bhagavan Adi Da. And losing face is about being utterly broken. We can’t love. We are Narcissus. We are philosophically predisposed to believe that we are unloved and disconnected for the Source. That is heart breaking. To know that the only way to love is to totally give yourself up to Reality is heart breaking.

When I look a Bhagavan Adi Da, i see an immense vulnerable Being of Love. He has no defenses, no ego strategies. He is totally given over to everyone. His radical Love breaks my heart.

Without Him, I am Narcissus, i am looking at my own reflection, protecting self. Living this relationship breaks you though. It makes you vulnerable. Bhagavan Talks about the Wound of Love frequently. It is a wound that never heals, it is always painful and it is always happy. We must endure love. We must suffer it. We’ve got to walk around broken with no faces!

It doesn’t make any difference what “you” do, think, whatever…Reality is Always Already the Case! Always! You can’t change it, add to it, make it not what it is.

It is important to understand what our contraction means. It is all about saving face, protecting “self” from the demand of love. That’s all.

We MU´╗┐ST be happy. We know in every moment what it would feel like to be perfectly free and happy, so we need to just do it!. Adi Da Is here, and we have been given the Greatest Gift possible. The utter sacrifice that He Is allows us to do the same, to feel Love and live in relation to the Heart directly.

What i’ve also gained an appreciation for recently is how exactly the Way of the Heart is intrinsically egoless.

it is not the ego that responds or recognizes Bhagavan Adi Da. It is the heart that spontaneously recognizes Him. It goes beyond ego at the beginning. So, it is not about conforming the ego to Him, it’s about forgetting it altogether and allowing that spontaneous heart recognition and response guide your entire life. And this responsibility of practice requires being broken, requires living via the feeling heart. Otherwise, you live as the ego; scared, searching, self-protective. So this is a great demand, one that destroys the entire foundation of your separate existence.

I just had a funny little dream. Bhagavan always breaks my heart in dreams.

In the dream, someone asked Adi Da what the weather was for the day, and He Replied: “Only God!

So, with Bhagavan Adi Da’s most exquisite meteorological prowess on our side, let’s get ready for a day and an eternity of perfect weather!

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